Put an End to a Struggle With a Friend

Dear Aunt Edith,

My friend hasn’t been hanging out with me so much lately. All she wants to talk about is her NEW friend. I AM SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MAD AT HERRRRR!!!!

I SAW HER GIVE MY FRIEND A NECKLACE AND SHE HAS THE SAME ONE AND I ASKED MY FRIEND ABOUT IT AND SHE WAS LIKE, “uh, I got it at 5 Below…” BUT I NO SHE LIES!!!!!!!!! LIIIIIIIIIIEZZZZZZZZZZ 2 MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. AAAAH!!!!!!! Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y!?!?!?!?!? THIS IS UNBELEIVEAVLE ! *cries in corner* WHAAAAAA….”

-LosingFriendy666

THE REST OF THIS LETTER HAS BEEN CLIPPED SO THAT YOU ARE NOT SITTING HERE FOR HOURS READING A STRANGER CRY, WHINE, AND SCREAM . I HAD TO. I WOULD NOT WANT TO WISH THAT KIND OF PAIN UPON ANYONE, EVEN MY DIRE ENEMIES. YOU OWE ME ONE.

Dear LosingFriendy666,

I’ve never in my life have seen such a dramatic letter, and when I was born the delivery doctor was a dinosaur. You just need to talk with your friend. Let me warn you:

THIS WILL BE EXTREMELY AWKWARD.

Approach your friend and say something such as:

“Hey, Sally Jo. Can I talk to you for a second?”

(Umm… Okay…)

“I feel like you’re spending more time with Cruz than me.”

(Sasuke…. You’re my best friend! I will always spend most of my time with you.)

“So you’re free tomorrow night for a sleepover?”

(Um… Actually… I have plans with Cruz. The night after? Oh, no, wait. I have plans with Cruz…)

“Die.”

(What?)

“Nothing. Sally Jo, don’t you see what I mean?”

(I’m sorry, Sasuke. Maybe… I dunno… I’ll buy you a cookie!)

“Cookies don’t fix broken hearts. You do.”

*Audience in the Background* AWWWWWWWWWWW…

(I’ll tell you what. I’ll spend more time with you, IF you find another friend. I don’t want you to be alone when I’m at another girl’s house. Okay?)

“Okay.”

*Audience in Background* YEAH! WOO-WHOO! *claps*

Talking can help a lot of things. And Sally Jo was right. Find MORE friends. Maybe you guys are just drifting, and although it can be slow and painful, it’s better than a bestie becoming a bully.

With Love,

Aunt Edith

P.S. Like how I named you Sasuke?

sasuke-wall01

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